My first pump for them

One might feel, why do I bother to do all these when they are gone?

Because they are my children and I'm a mother, even though baby Samuel stayed with us for only 1day 14 hours.

Short duration but sufficient for us to be called his daddy and mummy.

I had wanted to pump still, so that I can cremate the breastmilk along with them.

It's the last thing I can do, for them as a mother.

Did syringe-express yesterday, only manage 1ml.

Indeed not easy, to syringe drop by drop as I press out.

Today tried pumping as simply too engorged to press n syringe.

My yield? Surprisingly, 25ml!

Eben was watching me doing the pumping, amazed at how the mother's body produces milk.

Just sad to say, I can't pump for them till they grow out of it.

The emotion that comes with the pumping is so sweet yet bitter.

But in front of him, I can't shed tears, knowing he is equally devastated.